I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn’t, than live my life as if there isn’t, and die to find out there is!

Friday, February 6, 2009

A Modest Sensible Proposal...

I did not write this, and I don't know who did, but I like it. Enjoy, Wayne
A Modest Sensible Proposal...

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course.

Our two ideological sides of America cannot, and will not ever agree on what is right, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile, chalk it up to irreconcilable differences, and go our own way.

Here is a model dissolution agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that it should be relatively easy!

Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them.
You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.

You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move them).

We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street.
You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies, and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's, and rednecks.

We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.

You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.

You can have the peaceniks and war protestors.

When our allies or way of life are under assault, we'll provide them job security.

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values..
You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, and Shirley McClain.

You can also have the U.N. But we will no longer be paying the bill.

We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars.
You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.

You can give everyone healthcare, if you can find any practicing doctors.
We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right.

We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem.
I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya, or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics, and you can give trickle up poverty its best shot.

Since it often so offends you we'll keep our history, our name, and our flag.

In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you whatever you want on who will need whose help in 15 years.

P.S. Also, we'll throw in Barbra Streisand and Jane Fonda.

Be blessed,



Anonymous said...

"But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?"

aim4itnow said...

I am a lay minister also Wayne. How can you reconcile everything you just wrote about and this mission statement on your ministry website?

"Capstone Ministry is dedicated to spreading the word of God. .......... We welcome you to look around and know that You are deeply loved, fully pleasing, totally forgiven, absolutely accepted, and complete in Christ."

So often the conservative left displays a split personality...on the one hand speaking with Jesus' words while being critical of anyone who displays any kind of compassion for anyone.

Am I deeply loved, fully pleasing, totally forgiven, absolutely accepted, and complete in Christ...if I am a compassionate liberal who chooses daily to not serve my own interests, but to look out for the poor, the downtroden, the weak, the hurting...absolutely accepting everyone as being children of God regardless of where they are from?



Wayne Weeks said...

Reply to Anonymous and Roger,

First, let me say thank you for your comments and for caring enough to take the time to leave them. Perhaps I should have included some additional disclaimers in the introduction I made. I assumed all would recognize this a being hyperbole, designed to make people think.

If I were to be put into one of the two camps I would fit best in the conservative one, BUT I have 3 adult sons, one late 30's the other two in their 40's who couldn't be more liberal. Do you suppect I don't love them?

Again, I sincerely appreciate your comments.
Be blessed,

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